*ahem*
Step 1: Think about writing awesome speech for months
Step 2: Write awesome speech in moleskine for safe keeping a few days before wedding
Step 3: Make it to the reception with your speech
Step 4: Avoid stepping on the Bride's broken foot while pacing out your nerves
Step 5: Down a flute full of champagne
Step 6: Stop pacing and pretend to pay attention to Best Man's speech (which goes on too long)
Step 7: Down another flute of champagne
Step 8: Take microphone from Best Man
Step 9: Fumble with microphone and moleskine, then remember to set down champagne flute.
Step 10: Introduce yourself even though the DJ just did that for you.
Step 11: Completely forget to look at nicely written speech in moleskine and vomit out some words that make little sense.
Step 12: Blush
Step 13: Look at Speech.
Step 14: Recite Speech while injecting random word vomits here and there.
Step 15: Make Bride AND Groom cry with awesomeness of Speech-even though you word vomited a few times.
Step 16: Hug Bride, once again, avoiding broken foot.
Step 17: Hug Groom, try not to break HIS foot.
Step 18: Pick up Champagne flute and daintily sip for Toast
Step 19: Down rest of Champagne
Step 20: Ask waitress for another glass of Champagne
